Tuesday, May 1, 2018

May Day

A Blessed Beltane to those who celebrate! :) Today is Beltane, which I refer to as May Day. It's a day to celebrate the fertility of the Earth and the upcoming summer season. It's also a day to honour the garden fairies as they awaken from their long winter's sleep. These little creatures take care of the garden all summer long so it's a nice idea to leave a little plot of your garden wild so that they can mingle in safety. :)

A little fairy lore: If you drink water from a well after sunset on May Day, you will likely be kidnapped by the fae and taken to their realm where you will be imprisoned for a year and a day. Best stick to wine after sunset today! ;)

Alex and I went for a walk last night at sundown and caught this beautiful sky. Usually a bright colourful sky at sundown indicates hot weather the next day and the sky did tell the story! 

Charlie and Marlene

It's sunny and 20C today and I'm loving it. So are the dogs! Funny how it's so warm yet we have so much snow still! The girls are keeping cool on the snow in this balmy weather. :) The snow is littered with leaves and branches from the wind we've had the last few days. I spent the morning setting up my porch...aaah, the porch life returns! :)

I do a Tarot and/or Oracle reading nearly every day. I wanted to show you this card from my Celtic Tree Oracle...Isn't it beautiful? What do you think of when you look at this card? The first thing that came to mind for me was femininity. After reading about this card more, I wanted to share these very important messages that I got from it.

1. Cultivate an atmosphere of nurturing, compassion, safety and love.

2. Be the kind of person that you would like to have in your life.

3. Earth is a paradise, treat her kindly and carefully, she gives and we need to appreciate her bounty.

4. Accept the cycles of the Earth, but also the cycles of your life. Accept and appreciate where you are right now in your life cycle.

All of these suggestions are wonderful ones, good reminders too. Be generous and sweet! Enjoy your May Day! I hope this is the beginning of a warm and fruitful summer! :)

Friday, April 20, 2018

Feeling Trapped?


Poor Jack...his "imprisonment" of cage-life will be over in a week, then he has his sweet freedom. :)

Interesting comparison, but sometimes I feel like I have lost my freedom lately.

I am someone who is constantly in the process of self-improvement, self-therapy and healing. Way back when, I used to deny everything and brush it under the rug...filling the void with shopping, alcohol and eating. I was bitter, unhealthy, obese and broke. I hated my life but didn't know how to change it...or maybe I was just in a comfortable rut and didn't have the strength to try? I don't know...Dr. Phil had a very straightforward way of putting it..."How's that workin' for ya?"...in my years of depression recovery, I watched a LOT of Oprah and Dr. Phil! :)

But it's so true...how IS that workin' for ya? If something isn't working, why not change it? Of course, some things aren't easily changed due to emotional attachment, financial responsibilities, health challenges and so on...but nobody is really trapped are they? Nobody can control our thoughts and emotions as long as we don't let them.

We've become a society of complacency. Whatever the status quo dictates, a lot of people feel that's the way it should be. It ISN'T how it should be. Our lives should be led the way we want to lead them, end of story.

Most of my friends know our dog situation. As we get closer to the imposed deadline we gave to Stella and Pavlov's owner (Sunday the 22nd), I've been getting antsy, resentful, distrustful and very cautious. The last seven months of taking care of his dogs, his lies, his stalling, the stress it's caused, my routines and habits broken...it's gotten to me. Not only to I feel great sympathy and compassion for those two dogs whose lives have been so up and down the last four years...I feel betrayed. I really feel betrayed and I'm angry about it.

I've been reading so many articles lately on how to overcome feeling trapped. I've really been working on myself this week and have come up with these 7 ways to help you "un-trap" yourself and live a more joyful life:

1. Take responsibility: Are you feeling like a victim? Is someone or some memory of the past ruling your life and choices? What is stopping you from creating change? Happiness only comes when you step up and own your life. When you realize that (as an adult) your life is all about your own choices...you really become empowered...or overwhelmed...but it really is about choice.

2. Baby steps: What do you need to change? What little changes can you make each day to regain your confidence and make this change? Some things can't be changed all at once! Some things need gradual changes with small steps ahead, sometimes a few back too. If we rush into change like a bull in a china shop, we risk failing and giving up.

3. Crap I don't need: Make a list of everything in your life that you are doing out of obligation or that you really don't want to do. Why are you doing this? Time to escape the crap...write down what you need to do to remove this from your life. I have a "crap" list...it's so much smaller than it used to be thankfully!

4. The heck with others: Do you care too much about your image? About what others think of you? Do you put other people's emotions before your own emotions? Do you go along with what others want and neglect yourself, your relationship or your family? Be courageous...put your feelings first. Are you trying to impress people at the expense of your own happiness? Time to stop that and figure out why you need approval from others; the only person you need to impress is yourself.

5. Stop being a hero: Are you a people pleaser? Do you feel like you must always say YES!? Create and enforce boundaries to make your own life less stressful. Boundaries is such a buzz word, but honestly it's sound advice. Decide what you will and will not put up with and stick to your decision. I have been bad with boundaries in the past, and it takes a lot of courage and confidence to enforce them, but once you do, your life really does improve. I had iffy boundaries with family members who were abusive...I let them get away with too much and I was miserable. I finally enforced my boundaries, though it was tough...I am a much better person for it.

6. What if?: Do you suffer this syndrome? Ask yourself, what if the worst thing happens? What can I do about it? Usually the answer is "nothing" so stop with the what ifs! All it does is cause self-doubt and worry. We don't need that!

7. Feed your spirit: Most people link spirituality with organized religion. If organized religion is what keeps your faith strong, I respect you for it even if I don't share your belief because faith, no matter what form it takes, is a wonderful thing! :) But if you don't have a religion, it's still important to feed your spirit, your life force...do what makes your entire being feel blessed, happy and grateful. Do this daily. When your spirit soars, you can't possibly feel trapped.

I'm journaling like a mad woman these days but it's really helping me see perspective and not let all the turmoil be the center of my thoughts and emotions. I hope this post was helpful. :)

Monday, April 16, 2018


Thank you to all of my friends for your lovely comments the last few posts. I'm so sorry I haven't been able to respond personally and I feel bad about that. Life has been too complicated, dogs have been sick, friends have been irresponsible, life is nearly a shambles...we have been suffering stress that we don't need in our lives. I just want my life back...I am trying very hard to remember that this too shall pass!

I've been reading a book called The Language of Letting Go. It's a lovely book that has a daily message (she calls meditation) on self-healing. I love it. On my sidebar I have a contact form, if you want to "borrow" it, just email me, but you need an e-reader that opens "Epub" files to open it.

Here is a bit of April 13th's message, titled Enjoyment:

"One of the prohibitions many of us learned in childhood is the unspoken rule Don’t have fun and enjoy life. This rule creates martyrs—people who will not let themselves embrace the pleasures of day-to-day living.

We can go through the day making ourselves feel anxious, guilty, miserable, and deprived. Or we can allow ourselves to go through that same day feeling good.

There is much to be enjoyed each day, and it is okay to feel good. We can let ourselves enjoy our tasks. We can learn to relax without guilt. We can even learn to have fun."

We can ALLOW ourselves to go through the day feeling good. Yes...I do believe it's a choice. But you know what? Sometimes we need to feel bad to appreciate feeling good. Do you agree? I am such a sensitive soul...I feel as though I'm quite fragile most of the time. I have learned to deal with stress and create a life for myself that I can manage quite well. But throw a wrench in there and boy do I have a pickle of a time figuring things out!

I've been under a bit of a dark cloud lately. But...I see bright days ahead. Now if only Mother Nature would cooperate! It's been a LONG winter and I know that's not helping my mood!!! :)

Thanks to Pam for your encouragement you sweet lady. :)

Monday, April 2, 2018

Persephone: Queen of the Underworld

On April 3rd of each year, ancient cultures would celebrate the annual return of the goddess Persephone as a celebration of Spring's return.

The myth tells the story of a young maiden, Persephone, who was abducted by Hades, Lord of the Underworld. Persephone was tempted to eat pomegranate seeds, knowing that this would bind her eternally to Hades. She yielded to temptation and was cursed to spend three months of each year with Hades, learning the secrets of the dead as Hades' bride. 

For nine months of each year, she was allowed to return to Earth to her mother Demeter, wife of Zeus. During this time she was bound to her secrets. At the end of the nine months she spent with her mother, she returned to the Underworld. Demeter's anguish turned the Earth cold and barren during winter. When Persephone returned three months later, Demeter's joy restored spring to the Earth.

I think that everyone is tempted by something that they know deep down is not good for them, that will cause them to suffer. We can mask this as naivety or we can be honest with ourselves and realize that our need for instant gratification triumphed over patience, choice or will.

Persephone symbolizes secret keeping and being bound by silence. Sometimes it's not a bad idea to keep silent, but if it inhibits our growth, joy and leaves us with regrets, fear and resentment; then we have to find a way to release those secrets and not be bound by them.

I have some things that tempt me on a daily basis. If I give into them, I will not reach my goals and I will live in fear and regret. This option alone helps me make the right choices for myself.

My secrets however...those ruled me for nearly four decades. As my friends know, I'm pretty much an open book (now) and I talk about everything. Being reserved and withdrawn was my way of sheltering and protecting myself. All this managed to result in was nearly 40 years of misery.

Why not contemplate these things as you bond with Nature: sit outside, listen to the creek flowing, listen to the birds singing, watch the skies, feel the sunshine, feel your spirit and body, go for a walk or sit by your window by candlelight petting your dogs or cats. We only go around once and we have to work with what has been given to us. Regret, doubt, anger and trepidation are NOT options! :)

Friday, March 30, 2018

Seize The Day

I've lost track of the days lately. What with my little hound dog Jack being so sick/injured...back and forth to the vet, all the vet fees and shifting around of bill payments...it's enough to drive a gal out of her mind! But...as I always tell myself, this too shall pass and everything will work out in the end. It always does! :) I gave up caffeinated coffee a week ago...bad timing! ;) 

Things are slowly starting to get back to normal. The Moon is Waxing Gibbous tonight, ready to make her way into a full Blue Moon tomorrow. This is a strong time for magic or meditation on new ideas, new commitments, new projects. This is also a time for healing energy, family and loved ones coming together. I used my Celtic Tree Oracle for this spread today. It gave me a lot of good insight and comfort. If you are interested, I posted that reading here.

This is what a good optical zoom does...I took this photo of a Waxing Gibbous moon a few years ago. I LOVE my camera!

Do you seize the day? Do you make the best of your situation and live each day with gratitude despite the challenges?

You never know when a loved one, a pet, person or even your own life will be taken away from you. An emergency health scare really puts things into perspective. I never want to live with regret about anything. In order to do that, I have to live each day to my version of its fullest. Here are some questions to ponder this long weekend.

Do you place value on the immaterial?

Do you realize that you "can't take it with you"?

Do you hold on too tight to things, people, ideas that serve you no purpose at all?

Does guilt or fear keep you in toxic relationships?

Do you fill an empty void with frivolity?

Are you writing your own story or living someone else's?

Do you KNOW that you deserve happiness and love?

What's worse for you, failing or never trying?

What is stopping you from taking that proverbial first step?

This is a hard one, but imagine you have one day left on this Earth. What would you regret the most? What would you value the most? What do you need to do now to make sure that your last day on Earth will be filled with gratitude and love?

Jack is recovering, slowly but (I hope) surely

Beauty. Art. Love. Comfort. Nature, Home, Pets, Alex, Friendship. These are the most important things in my life. I let go of materialism a long time ago and never looked back. I let go of toxic people as well a long time ago and will never look back. I made a very unalterable decision to only allow love and happiness in my life and for the most part, I've seized that every single day. If today were my last day on Earth, I would feel so much gratitude for the life I have right now.

Thawing Rivière du Nord

Water is a healing element, it flows and spreads love and healing energy, it washes away negativity and pain. It's cleansing.

Here is a little healing charm you can do if you have access to a lake, stream, pond or river.

Find yourself a little rock or pebble. During a Waxing Gibbous and/or Full Moon, hold this item close to your heart and let it absorb your pain, your thoughts and your wishes for healing.

Bring this item with you to a source of natural water. Express your gratitude for the water in front of you. Dig a hole near the shore and place your rock or pebble in the hole and cover it up, releasing all of your thoughts, pain and wishes as you bury it. 

Take some time to visualize everything that you released into that item seeping down into the Earth and flowing away into the water for healing.

If you can't bury your item, release it gently into the current as you feel the healing power of the water.

Friday, March 23, 2018

Encouraging Spring and WHY???

March 22 2018 Windy Sunset
I love all sorts of folklore and especially weather lore, I watch the skies and the critters to try and predict the upcoming weather patterns. The following combination predicts a fantastic agricultural year ahead:

Snowy February
Wind in March
April Showers
Dry May

Two out of two so far! :) Do I dare have hope??? I read a funny quote by someone named Vogel "To shorten winter, borrow some money due in spring." :)

More weather proverbs: "As March hastens, all the humours feel it." 

My humours definitely feel March as it hastens! All I want is warm, sunny weather again and I feel teased a little every year during the month of March because I know that in this climate, we are in for at least a few more soul-sapping snow storms.

On this date in ancient Rome, a Pagan festival was held to invoke the god Mars to help with banishing the last of the winter from the city. Magick rituals were performed to encourage the growth of crops and gardens. For a little kitchen witchery, cook a meal today with plants ruled by Mars...anything hot and fiery like peppers, cinnamon and ginger come to mind. Some herbs ruled by the god Mars are cilantro and cumin, so why not conjure up a nice Mexican Fiesta to encourage the melting of the snow? :)

Last night's nightmare: I was in bed alone in the dark. I felt a presence, knew someone or something was there in the shadows. I was terrified. I had a big knife under my pillow and I grabbed it in my hand. I lifted my arm in preparation to defend myself when I heard a horrible screeching. I stabbed whatever creature was lurking in the dark and it tried to stab me back. 

I woke up screaming and Alex came running. My heart was racing and I was too terrified to open my eyes. Jack, my lovely loyal hound dog came running too. I wish these nightmares would cease. It's been suggested to me that an evil spirit may be haunting me, that a demon may be trying to enter my mind...but in order to believe these things could exist, one must believe in monotheism, which I don't. I have quite an open mind, but I really believe I still have some post-trauma that I have to deal with at some level.

This got me thinking about my repressed emotions. You'd think that 9 years of therapy might have helped with that, but apparently there is still something lurking that is threatening my well-being. I wrote the above Tarot spread to help me out today. These aren't easily answerable questions, so I thought I'd spend some time this weekend with my decks and my thoughts to try to get a hold on what's going on up in my noggin! If that's possible! :)

I'm not much into philosophy, thinking too much has proven not to be a good thing for me...but I was reading that on this day in history, Nietzche was award his PHD in Philosophy, so here are some headache-inducing questions for you to ponder this weekend:

Why is there something rather than nothing?
Is our universe real?
Can you experience something objectively?
How do we really define what is right and what is wrong?
What are numbers if we really can't see them?
Did I invent the question mark? 

The last question is kind of a joke...because I saw the second Austin Powers movie recently where Dr. Evil states that his father claimed to have invented the question mark. I'd love to state to a total stranger that I invented the question mark, just for their reaction lol!

Are you lamenting spring? Teased a little by the weather? Are you thinking too much? :)

Tuesday, March 20, 2018

πŸ’πŸ’ Happy Ostara! πŸ’πŸ’

Happy Ostara my friends! :) Today is the Spring Equinox and I couldn't be more thrilled. Even though we still have Godzilla-like snow banks all around the village, the days are reaching above zero and the sun is shining more often than not...my window garden is doing so well and I am very close to driving myself nuts with spring fever lol! :)

Today I'm going to plant some more herbs to make sure I always have some handy. I may start some more lettuce too, I have to find room in the window! 

For me, spring = happy. So this influenced the Ostara spread I made. What makes my physical being happy is what also makes my mental and spiritual being happy too: good food, health, good weather, fun hobbies, a cozy home, good friends, being in Nature, lots of happy healthy fur babies and a loving relationship. I'm a simple gal! :)

Wascally Wabitt!! A rabbit in my yard when I lived in Morin Heights in 2010

Rabbits are symbols of Ostara. I see rabbit tracks in the yard a lot this time of year, but it's rare to see them here, they mostly stick to the woods and boy are they quick! Kind of crazy that last night's dream/nightmare was about a rabbit! My dream was that a rabbit somehow got into the cottage and was hurting my dogs. I woke up so scared and had to hug each of the pets, then Alex too!

I'm a wee bit late with my "Spring Ahead" spread, which I wanted to post when we changed the clocks ahead a few weeks back. Again, I'm baffled as to how this time change became the norm. Our dogs get confused still about feeding times, and I've heard from many a homesteader that it messes up their farm animals and critters too. 

If you have a Tarot or Oracle deck, why not draw four cards for new ideas you can bring to your home, mind, spirit and heart? :)

Or just ask yourself the questions and get creative! My biggest new idea to bring to my home is to concentrate on frugality and every thing I can do to make buying a home next year a reality. Another thing I'm doing is planning a better garden for the summer. Last year I had hits and misses, this year I know what should work well and I'll be taking great care of the garden more than I did last year. I know the value of home grown veggies and fruit and that's all I want to eat! Not possible yet, but I'm on my way. :) I stopped the cheesemaking for a while due to time and honestly, some failures last year, but I'll be trying again this spring. :)

Prince Edward Island Sunset - December 2009

As for my mind, spirit and heart...it's all about being out in Nature more and bringing more love into my life, changing my perspective and being grounded each day to keep anxiety away. Alex and I have vowed to spend more time together walking in the woods and out on the lake shore fishing. I have a really nice camera and my goal this year is to take more photos of Nature and the forest animals. I used to take so many, but somehow found the excuse that my phone's camera was easier, shame on you Rain... but not anymore. :) I love photography and I have the perfect setting! This brings my spirit a lot of joy too. Any goals in mind? Any plans for Ostara? 

Now listen friends, we now have only 3 months of amazing and awesomely long days (at least in this part of the world)! When the Summer Solstice arrives, it starts to get darker again so take advantage and enjoy! :)